Experience, Descripton & Communication

There is only ONE Experience, yet INFINITE descriptions expressed in TWO Forms of communication.

The sun shines down on my face, and I raise my eyes skyward.  Taking off my glasses, I close my eyelids and feel the thin skin of them warm, flushing my face with heat and light, and for me, with hope.  I take sustenance and encouragement.

But on the same day, in the same place, under the same sun, another person might feel hot, oppressed and chased by demons that shine from the very heavens, constantly dodging them, destroying their hope.

Experience is universal, yet unique for all.  We all have “it”, and sometimes, standing there together we experience some things for which there are no words.  We have all had this experience, and the phenomena has been much studied, yet words or no words, we are still taking divergent descriptions from even these shared moments.

Everyone brings their own description to every experience.  We actually perceive things differently, sometimes vastly divergent based upon the exact same stimulus—different feelings, different conclusions and different needs vis-a-vie our shared collective.

This is where communication comes into play, and it is where our global civilization must quickly make some key decisions about how we treat each other.  How we organize our collective to care for, nurture and accept the varied needs and contributions of ALL.

We fight over who’s "right" and who’s "wrong," yet this is like me telling the person made hot by the sun that it’s really not hot.  It misses the basic construct of the universe’s intelligence/life/spirit: we each make up our own mind, and then plunges ahead to advocate for a singular version of “right” when that argument is truly non-sense in light of this basic way the universe is built:

Experience is Universal; Description is individual.

Because the act of experiencing and forming meaning is universal, everyone's experience has merit, has worth, and unlike the propaganda of fundamentalist religions, a diverse society is not any more immoral than the one of our segregated past or advancing present.  Morality is a separate issue from diversity and the universality of experience--there is no "wrong" experience.

In some ways, accepting this universal diversity is the primal moral issue every sentient being must face before all others.  It influences everything that comes after it, including all communication.  For our shared experience is our critical ingredient to add to what nature has wrought—how we think about and treat each other. 

Because Experience is Universal, there are only two Forms of Communication: 1) "I need to say this," and 2) "I want you to hear this."  Every type and medium of communication are somehow composed of one, the other or some combination of these two forms.

When we need to communicate, in any form, at any time, to anyone, we subconsciously or consciously as ourselves "What do I need to say?" and "What do I want them to take away?"  Whether a talk with your spouse, a presentation at work, a call with your Mom, a eulogy for a lost loved one, a song or book or painting shared with others, a first date, holding hands under the stars, making love, dancing alone or in front of the world.  Everything we do is made up of a need to say and a need to be heard.

From the time we hit sticks, threw rocks and danced for each other in fur skins, our fully communicating beings expect both to say their piece and to be heard.  It is in our genes and throughout our logic and language systems.  Many modern people, especially men, forget to give as well as they expect to get with these two forms, and therein lies the root of a lot of the conflict in our world.

How you think about your own thoughts and thought processes matters most of all for your ability to evolve and change.  We are learning now that what kind of communication models we share with each other, how those models represent respect and cooperation instead of derision and competition is critical. 

What do “they” have to say? What do “they” want us to hear?  What must I say?  How can I get you to hear this?

In an increasingly crowded world, what we tell ourselves and teach our children about experience, descriptions and how to communicate with each other across that infinite diversity is likewise increasingly critical.  

Perhaps in teaching our children, we can ourselves learn to accept everyone and work together, instead of continuing to judge and fight to win at any cost.